Thursday, April 10, 2014

Skewed Reality


TV has given me a skewed sense of reality. Shocking, right? I know, TV is usually beaming with reality, what with Toddlers and Tiaras, Honey Boo Boo (a piece of me just died as I typed that), Jersey Shore, Teen Mom, etc... 

Here's a list of my (as my granny says) "stories" and how they have skewed my reality:
  • The Walking Dead - I'm now worried that any minute a zombie apocalypse is going to break out and I am going to have to strategically find all of my friends and family and we are going to have to make our way to the local prison for safety and judging the way my garden is growing, I will not be the farmer of the group, so I need to brush up on my marksmanship or head stabbing...
  • Revolution - Every time the power flickers, I think "Ok, this is it... It's go time." Then the power comes back on and I think, "Ah, just as well, I'm not sure I'm ready for survival mode. Have you seen my garden?"
  • Weeds (terrible show, I know, guilty pleasure) - I now believe that every small "mom & pop" shop is a front for something illegal. "Oh, you've only had two customers all week and you can afford to keep the business open??" Likely story... Plus, apparently pretty much everyone smokes pot, regularly.
  • Dexter - It's apparent to me that being a serial killer is much easier than I would have initially expected. I mean as long as you dump the body in the gulf stream and don't keep a token, you are golden.
  • Nashville - It's now clear to me that all musicians are tortured souls who come from crazy backgrounds or have addiction problems. Wait... that one just may be reality...
  • Lost - Flying has always creeped me out, but now I'm worried about my plane disappearing. I mean seriously, that doesn't happen, right??? Oh... wait... it does.
Ok, so maybe those last two aren't too skewed, but do you see how easily I get sucked in? I'm way too gullible. The next thing you know I'm going to be the mysterious lead singer of a rock group who, by day, is the owner and manager of Starlight Music and who's adopted this persona with the help of my holographic computer. Far fetched, huh?

to the moon and back,

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Healing

I've cried
questioned
fought
listened
I've leaned on God
on the bible
on family
on friends
I've felt angry
betrayed
overwhelmed
and just lost
I've bit my tongue
lashed out
reached out
and been crossed
I've been disappointed
disgruntled
alarmed
ashamed
but I know God is with me...
I am with God
washed in the blood
surrounded by family
covered in love
I'm lost in the Word
seeking Him more
accepting hugs
rising above

to the moon and back,

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Sticks & Stones


Choose your words wisely. We've all been taught that saying when we were little "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me", but after 30something years of living I have found over and over again that that isn't true.

I'd take a physical wound over an emotional one. Broken bones can heal, gashes heal, punctures heal, bruises heal and all you're let with is a scar... emotional hurt lasts.

Not only does it last, but it can ruin people. A rumor can end marriages, end careers, end friendships, end reputations.

Hurtful words can break a person down to a shell of their former self.

Words can also heal. They can heal hurt, heal marriages, heal hearts.

While they can fix miss-communications, once they have been said, there is no turning back. There's no "take backs". If you say it, make sure it's true because if it's hurtful enough, it will leave a scar that can never be forgotten.

Gossip can ruin someone, but it's so easy to fall into that pit. Dishing the dirt is interesting because it helps us feel better about ourselves. We feel superior because "at least we are that bad, or that messed up or that out of control."

I'm just as guilty as the next person, maybe even more so, that's my demon to battle.

If what you are saying can't be said in front of the person you are talking about, then it's probably gossip and probably hurtful.

Proverbs 12:18 NIV "The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."

to the moon and back,

Friday, December 6, 2013

Elf of the Shelf

I don't get it. Why is this thing everywhere you turn?

There are pictures on Facebook, pins on Pinterest with ideas for him and bloggers are blogging about him so fast that I can smell the smoke from their keyboards over here.

So what's the draw? Beats me. In fact, here are a few reasons why I don't and won't give in to the "Elf-mania".

  1. Because... hello... I don't want this staring at me:
  2. Because I have watched one too many scary movies in my day and that thing will surely come to life and kill you while you sleep.
  3. Because I don't understand why, if you are teaching kids to be nice and good by pretending to "spy" on them (which is apparently only important in December), why is said "Santa Operative" doing naughty things every night? Shouldn't he be being a better example? If it's "cool" for him to be naughty, isn't that what the kiddos are picking up on? But maybe I'm reading too much into it. (I realize they aren't all naughty, but most seem to be)
  4. Because he's uber creepy
  5. and most importantly,

    I mean, seriously, how do people have time for all of that?
With all that being said, I did see a friend who is using the elf to promote good with her kids. Every morning her "Elfie" is holding a note with a good deed for the kids to do. I do think that's a great idea, however, as I have stated before, I don't get passionate for much. So, Senor Elf, I have no time or passion for your antics.

to the moon and back,

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Basking in my food coma


Here I sit, bloated, uncomfortable and semi-motionless due to crashing from my carb laden sugar-high, but with no regrets. 

Did I eat too much? Absolutely.

Did I consume enough calories to feed a small nation? Quite possibly

Would I do it again? Most definitely!

Food and coma aside, I love Thanksgiving. I'm a nostalgic person (in case you haven't noticed here and here and here) so having a day steeped in tradition is a-ok in my book.

The smells, the sounds, the sites. 

Watching my mom prepare a meal that I used to watch my granny prepare makes me happy. Being able to help out, is something that I was looking forward to all week. It seems silly to spend days and hours preparing a meal that will be eaten in about 20 minutes (and munched on off and on for the next few days) but that time preparing is quality time spent with family. 

I remember being at my granny's house watching her work feverishly at getting everything done in time. My papa sitting on the couch pretending he doesn't want to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. I remember all of my aunts, uncles and cousins accumulating at Granny's and chowing down. I remember the laughter, the love, the sarcasm, the feuds, the good and the bad. The point is we were together every year. I miss that. I love what we had today, but I miss the days of everyone coming together.

As such, today I am thankful for memories. New memories, old memories, memories yet to be made. 

I hope you all had a great day and made lots of new memories and are in the process of enjoying your very own food coma as you read this!
to the moon and back,


Monday, November 25, 2013

Why is it so difficult?

Here is a picture of happy coffee because I my brain isn't functioning
at 100% and I can't come up with a creative one to suite the topic.

Here's my question, why is it so difficult for me to spend money on myself? I'll buy stuff for Moose, for Jon, for my family for my friends, but when it comes to me, I feel terribly guilty.

Especially if its a big a purchase. So, why?

Why can't I treat myself?

What if I spend a lot of money on something and then don't use it? What if it's not what I really want, but then can't return it? What if it doesn't last? What if it doesn't work? I could use that money on something more important. It would be selfish if I purchased (insert product here).

How could I spend good money on a yoga membership, or a pedicure, or a new (used) car, or a new computer, or a facial, or new clothes, or a haircut/color when we need a new roof and we need to remodel our master bath, and we need to redo our utility room, and we need to repair my car and Moose would love more toys and Jon would appreciate more bike stuff and I could put that money towards bills and I shouldn't be irresponsible, blah, blah, blah and this and that and so on and so forth....

I wish that just one time I could do or get something without feeling a ridiculous amount of self-inflicted guilt. Would it kill me to be slightly irresponsible? Probably not, but then again, what if something comes up and we could have used that money for something else?

Ugh.... I'm done venting now... Thanks to you, my loyal readers for listening while I have a "poor me" moment. :)

to the moon and back,

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Shameless

Shameless confession: (Yes, shame-less, as in "one without shame".) I didn't go to college. Well, that's not entirely true. I went to college, for a year and a semester, but no college degree, so I amend my original statement to reflect "I don't have a college degree."

Shocker? I know right? You'd think with my mad writing skills that I was trained in the art of literary... uh... stuff. So, uh, yea, I can't even come up with the correct adjective to accurately describe the art in which I put my thoughts to paper computer screen. Art is subjective, right?

Anyway, one nice thing about me not "really" going to college is that I have never experienced the burden that is known as a student loan! That's right, folks, I am now and always have been student loan free! Which means that I was not scrambling to find a job before the repayment process started.

Instead, I explained to my parents that I was going to take some time off from college (because I really didn't know what I wanted to study anyway) to visit my then fiancé (now hubby) in Germany for just short of 2 weeks as a graduation gift from his parents. Imagine their delight....

That "time off" turned into a job, which turned into a career (a pretty nice one at that). I quickly moved from receptionist to "Membership Director" to "Director of Membership & Special Events". The latter title did not suit my actual position witch also included AR/AP, committee liaison, customer service, etc... This later ended in a bitter parting of ways (which I elude to here).

I've been many things since opting to not finish college, some of them have served me well and padded my bank account, others have made happy and some not so much.

So, here I am, an adult, with a husband, a son, responsibilities and such and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I've never regretted not finishing college. Which also means I never got a degree that I later regretted. I know I've talked to people who have gotten a degree in something and after a few years, hated their field of study. I feel like that would have been the case for me, mainly because I have a short attention span.

If I had followed some of my "dreams" here's the short list of careers I would have embarked on...
  • Horticulturist
  • Something in the field of Criminology
  • Nutritionist
  • Photographer
  • Et cetera, Et cetera, Et cetera
So, I'm making a good living cleaning houses and doing sales and marketing for Dapper Snappers and I'm being paid in all of the love and hugs I could ever want (and if you know me, you know it doesn't take much) being a mommy and a wife, that's more than enough for me.

I admire anyone who had the dedication and motivation to get a degree (especially those who went on to get their Bachelor's, Master's or Doctorate's), but I honestly don't regret not getting one for myself. Nor do I feel like it adds or takes away from my worth. 

to the moon and back,