21 Days...

Here we are, in the throws of 2017 and I don't think I have actually written anything since 2015. Loser, I know... I bet you're wondering why?? No? Well I'll tell ya anyway. Life. That's why. Something we have all succumbed to, so I know its not a good excuse. But, alas, here we are.

This year, I'm trying to focus on getting healthier "mind, body & spirit". After doing some yoga in January and some acupuncture, Chinese medicine and chiropractic, the next phase starts Monday.

The hubby and I are starting the 21 Day Sugar Detox. The thing is, I've felt really crappy for a while and I know it's because I've been eating like crap, or at least that's a good place to start. You are what you eat and the junk I have been "fueling" my body with, well, is just junk.... I've been tired, moody, sore, irritable, foggy headed. I don't sleep well and never feel rested. (I would like to insert here that I'm not looking for a quick fix or a magic pill or supplements, I won't stick to those and it's really not in the grocery budget since I also have to feed a family.) There's a laundry list of other symptoms but I'll stop there because I'm sure you're bored.

That's where the detox comes in. The hubby and I are ready to make a change for ourselves and the kiddos. They already eat way healthier than us, however, I see our bad habits creeping in and that scares me. Their health is in our hands and that's a heavy weight to bear.

Anyway, tonight I started prepping so we are ready to go on Monday. I made up some of the dressings from the cookbook.

Avo-goddess (pictured), Sesame Ginger Dressing and Balsamic Vinaigrette

I also attempted to make their homemade mayo. I say attempted, because I'm pretty sure I'll end up tossing it. The recipe called for "macadamia nut oil or any nut oil" so I thought, hmm.... cocoanut is a "nut" right? I'm pretty sure it is not. I also added sesame oil, because a seed is similar to a nut, right? Probably not, but, alas, here we are... Runny mayonnaise and all. Here's to hoping it sets up in the fridge.

I did cook the mustard glazed chicken thigh's tonight and they were delish, we will definitely do those again. All the boys, big and little, ate them up.

I'm going to try to keep you posted on our progress throughout, like how we are feeling, if we are losing weight, how the food tastes, if we have killed each other...

to the moon and back,

My thighs touch

Life gets heavy (as my cousin-in-law states in her blog) and I feel it's been extra heavy lately, so I am here to lighten it up a bit, at least metaphorically, because I'm talking about thick thighs and technically, that, too, would be heavy...

Last night, I had planned on writing this blog but switched topics when our dinner out was derailed by an oblivious mom. So, even though you were probably hoping I forgot, I am going to take on this highly controversial topic because I am a giver. Guys (if there are any guys who read this), you can stop reading here. You won't understand and it will probably make you uncomfortable.

And now... without further ado here's what I think about my thighs touching...

I hate it, but probably not for the reason that you think. I don't need that gap between my thighs that uber skinny girls get to validate my existence. (If you have the "gap", yay for you, I ain't hatin') Also, I'm not saying that I am fat (10 or 20 lbs heavier than I'd like to be, yes, but fat, no). (Note: this post is riddled with sarcasm, it's who I am, people!)

Reasons why I hate that my thighs touch:

1. It that means I can't actually wear running shorts to run. Why? Because A. my shorts creep up (yea, I know TMI, but you asked) and I'm constantly fighting a losing battle to keep them down and B. because running, with thighs that touch, with out some sort of chaffing cream or ointment (ugh, that word grosses me out) is super uncomfortable and jeopardizes future runs because of injury. So... it's yoga pants or running capri's for me.
2. I can't wear my running shorts when biking. Why? See the answer to #1. Believe it or not it happens while biking too.
3. I can't wear shorts any shorter than mid thigh, which is generally appropriate in most situations, however, when I go to the beach, shorter (not micro) shorts would be nice so I can get a little sun. Why can't I? See the answer to #1.
4. Summer dresses are uncomfortable. Why? See the answer to #1B. That means that pantyhose (nasty invention) or some sort of spanx are in order to prevent chaffing and then, really, what's the point? Summer dresses are supposed to be cool, and all of those undergarments kill that idea.
5. Corduroy pants are out of the question... Can we say "friction fire"? Ok, so there haven't been a lot of corduroy pants that I just couldn't live without, but I'd like the option in case I want to try to fit in with the preppy set of the 80's or the grunge crowd of the 90's.

That's all I can think of for now. I don't actually sit around all the time criticizing my thighs. All of the points above actually came about from a conversation with friends the other day. 

And finally, Taylor, this one's for you...

to the moon and back,

Run, Forest, Run

I mentioned a few posts ago that I am working towards my goal of running a 5K. While that goal has been a little delayed because of our move, I am happy to report that I am working towards it full force now and have been for about 3 weeks or so. My friend, Lacey and I have decided to tackle the goal together. It always makes it nice to have an accountability partner. We even signed up for our first 5K race at Epcot. It's the Disney Royal Family 5K at the end of February. I plan to run (ok, realistically, jog) the whole way. No walking. I don't expect to win, just finish.

I want to prove I can do it and I want to be a good role model for my son. See the thing is, I have issues with following through with things for myself. I have great ideas and lofty expectations, but after about 2 weeks, I'm done. Now, if I am working for someone else, I have great follow through and will put my whole heart into it (makes no sense, I know). I want to make this goal the exception and the start of finishing things for me!

Now, back to running, I have to say, I am enjoying it much more than I thought I would. I mean, 3 weeks ago I was dying after jogging for 30 seconds and today I ran 5 minutes straight and a total of 16 minutes with short walking breaks between. I know I still have a way to go to reach 5k status, but I'll get there.

I have heard that exercise is a natural anti-depressant, but I have never experienced it for myself. I have exercised on a regular basis and besides weight-loss, I can't say that I noticed anything else. If you have read some of my previous posts, you know that I have struggled on and off with postpartum depression. There are days when I am great, and others when I am not so much. I have also been diagnosed with PMDD (which is terribly embarrassing, but since I'm using this as my therapy, it's ok!) which is a monthly struggle. HOWEVER... since I have been running, I have felt GREAT. Seriously, I wouldn't have believed it if I wasn't experiencing it.

From the day I had Moose, all I have said that I just want to feel normal mentally again (back to my old self) with out forcing everything and I am happy to say that running has brought that back for me. Don't get me wrong, I have an AMAZING God, hubby, son, family and friends who have all helped tremendously, but the running has given me that final boost. I can't really explain it but my mind is clearer, I am more at ease and way less stressed out.

I can't thank my hubby enough for supporting me and helping out more so I have time to run, and Lacey for darn near killing me by pushing me to my limits when we run together.

All in all, I am super excited about the 5K next month and I will definitely write about my experience... that is, if I survive...

Plus, if I am ever going to have a second child, I need to get this goal out of the way and hopefully it will help me be in the best shape ever!

To the moon and back,

Low-Cal Enchiladas

So, in an effort to save money and calories, I have been cooking more. I really do love to cook, especially when I can make stuff up off the cuff. My hubby says I have a knack for it. I love the challenge of looking into my fridge/cabinet and coming up with something unique and tasty with stuff I have on hand.

Tonight, I decided on my version of enchiladas, which were of the venison persuasion. Now, if you aren’t a fan of bambi (as my hubby calls it), you can substitute extra lean ground beef, ground turkey or ground chicken.  I choose venison, one because it’s a lean meat and two because my brother-in-law blesses us with a ton of meat every hunting season. I have a very southern upbringing and come from a family of hunters, so I am not fazed by it. In fact, my mom raises a cow every year and takes it to market so she has a freezer full of fresh, hormone free and antibiotic free beef (all cuts-ribeye, ground beef, roast, stew meat, etc…)

Anyway, on to dinner…

4 Huge Servings (Less than 400 Calories Each)!

Venison Enchiladas

1 Can Low Sodium Black Beans (15 oz)
4 Cups Stewed Tomatoes
½ Cup Chopped Onions
1 Can Ro-Tel - Original Diced Tomatoes & Green Chilies (if you aren’t a fan of heat, skip these)
1 Cup Frozen Spinach
8 oz Ground Venison
4 Ole High Fiber Low Carb Tortillas
2 Oz Cabot - Cheddar Cheese 50% Reduced Fat
1 tbsp Argo - Cornstarch
2 tsp Chili powder

Salt & Pepper to taste

Pre heat the oven to 350. In a skillet brown the ground meat with the onions, salt and pepper. In a separate pot, heat the stewed tomatoes, Ro-Tel tomatoes, spinach and chili powder until boiling. Once the meat is browned, drain any grease and then add the black beans. Now that the tomato mixture is boiling, mix the cornstarch with a little water until it's blended. Slowly stir the cornstarch into the tomato mixture.  Take half of the tomato mixture and add it to the meat mixture. In a 9x13 pan spoon in a layer of the tomato mixture to cover the bottom. Divide the meat mixture in to four and fill each tortilla shell equally then place in the pan. Pour the remaining tomato mixture over the enchiladas and then top with the cheese. Bake until cheese is browned.

Super yummy! I added a little guacamole to mine. I served mine with a side of veggies, you could also top it with some shredded lettuce and a few chopped raw onions.

Enjoy! I shall now relax and enjoy my peppermint mocha flavored coffee.... Ahhhh....

To the moon and back,

What's... What's my... What's my motivation?

Ugh.... So, I did the unthinkable tonight, I looked back at pictures of myself prior to Moose.

Before - 199 lbs (ack!!!)

A little history about me, I have been on the heavier side most of my life. I've been just a little overweight, really over weight and straight up what I would call fat (it's not insulting, when I'm referring to myself, ha!) and then, for a brief shinning moment (about 2 years total) I was at my goal weight. It took two years of hard work and dedication, but I lost almost 80 lbs and was not only the thinnest I have ever been, but also the healthiest and most in shape. I could jog right at two miles straight without stopping. Yes, me, who would get winded walking to the mail box, could run and I loved it. I lost the weight and kept it off for a little over 2 years (until I got pregnant). I wore a bikini for the first time since I was like 5 and I went from a size 18 to a very comfortabe size five (I don't remember EVER being a size 5, I was a size 9 in 8th grade). Ahhh.... size 5... you seem like such a distant memory now.

After (pre-baby) - 125lbs

Now, I'm not so much a 5 as I am a size 11. I know that's not fat, please understand that I am NOT saying I am fat. I am saying that looking back at photo's of when I was thrilled with my overall image makes me sad and makes me really want to get back there. I am saying that I am not content with where I am now.

Here's the problem... MOTIVATION! Yep, I have a motivation problem and a temptation problem (mainly stupid pumpkin stuff, stupid fall and your stupidly delicious coffee drinks and pumpkiny goodness).  Ugh! That being said, I am really gonna try to get rid of the extra pounds now. I mean really, I can't keep blaming it on Moose now that he's like 2 years old. At some point I have to take responsibility. Since I am the one who is shoveling bite after bite of pumpkin cheesecake in my mouth (ahhh, pumpkin cheesecake, why must you be the devil?) Tonight my salad for dinner and my snack of carrots, radishes and snow peas was negated because of said pumpkin cheesecake.

Current (post-baby) - 150 something...

How did I do it before? Well, as cliche as it sounds, diet and exercise. Although I will say my definition of "diet" was a complete lifestyle change. I literally watched what I ate and portions were EVERYTHING. Anyone who saw my pantry at that time, thought I was a freak. As soon as I got home from the grocery store and farmers market, I spend a few hours portioning and prepackaging everything, frozen meats, veggies, snacks, wheat pasta, etc... Everything got sorted into snack baggies and was portioned in 1 to 2 serving sizes. That took all of the guess work out for me and made it so easy to just grab and go. I was very dedicated (I can't remember a time when I was more dedicated to something). The best part was that Jon and I did it together so I didn't have to worry about cooking differently for him. He lost almost 80lbs at the time, too. (He did it in 6 months as compared to my 2 years... stupid boys and their fast metabolisms).

Jon has agreed to try it again, plus we want to be good examples for Moose (although, he eats way better than we do, I am super strict about what goes into his mouth). I would like to run again, but the thing I hate about running is the whole getting used to running again. Jon is amazing. He can go 6 months or more without running and get out and run a 5k with no problem (stupid boys and that whole "hunting" gene). He is the best running coach ever, though. He can always make me go just a little further each time.

Ok, I think I have really talked myself into it. Let see how this goes. I'll keep you posted, but, no worries, it's not going to completely take over my blog.

Love, hugs & caffeine,

Emotional Eater, Party of One...

I'm an emotional eater, there I said it... what a weight off my shoulders! Now hand me a cream puff... crap, there it goes again.

Basically, it goes like this...

• When I'm happy, I celebrate with eating
• When I'm sad, I self medicate with food
• When I'm stressed, I feel better with chocolate
• When something good happens, we go out to dinner
• When my favorite TV show is on, bring out the pretzels

Notice a pattern here?  I sure do... but I rationalize by saying, "I'll be better tomorrow".

Tomorrow... ahh, tomorrow... there is always tomorrow, yet tomorrow never seems to get here.

Why do I do this? Beats me, I mean, technically I feel better mid bite, but before I can brush the crumbs off my shirt, I am already thinking, "Why, did I eat that? I didn't need it". Then I walk by the pantry and hear the peanut butter calling my name.

How does emotional eating effect dieting?? Umm, hello, negatively!

Sure, I still blame those few extra lbs on baby weight (I know he's almost 2, don't judge me!), but I'm starting to think that those 4 cream puffs I just ate aren't helping anything either. I gained (gulp) 49lbs when I was pregnant. The 2 weeks after he was born I lost 30lbs (postpartum and breastfeeding will do that to you). A few of those lbs creeped back (mainly on my thighs, I think) and I am still about 25lbs or so heavier than I was pre-pregnancy... ugh... Let me be perfectly clear, I am by no means saying I'm fat, I am just not at my goal weight. Sometimes being a girl sucks! *We are always worrying about weight, makeup, fashion, shoes, skin care, being submissive little housewives... (haha!!! Now that I have set the feminist movement back a few years, I'll stop!)

*Disclaimer: Just to clarify, I was making a joke about the things we actually worry about, we are way more complex than that, I mean, I didn't even mention hair care... ;)

And now for a laugh (more cartoons I came across while searching for one to suit the topic):